Who Do Narcissistic Men Target?

What Traits Make You a Prime Target & What Point Should it Become a Legal Matter?



I keep on seeing people from various corners of the planet, who regularly do things that others would be challenged about, and in some cases, have legal action taken against them.  In all cases, the class system appears to play a part in terms of the ‘turning of a blind eye’ to certain actions, because some people are seen as above the law, or their behaviour is seen as a grain of sand in an otherwise trouble free existence. Good character etc etc.   Some people anyway.  If we explore this category further, we can further subdivide the perpetrators, and do the same with the people they target.

For the regular perpetrators of certain categories of acts, with research, it is possible to see even more patterns and trends, of both the perpetrators and also the people they choose to be on the receiving end of their behaviour.

In the UK we have a system that has a number of groups seen to be at the top of the societal matrix, and as such, the power they hold and wield, enables them to appear exempt from being held to account for anything.  Most of them rarely appear in the press, and if they do, the language used is very different to someone else behaving in the same manner, but who fall outside of those societal groups.  The groups being, Government, Monarchy, Aristocracy, Media – printed and televised, Law Enforcement.

There is clear evidence that in a few cases, not only is the language different, but in some cases, the reporting of the said behaviour is sensationalised, and almost replicates a crowd mentality baying for blood.  It is like a hunter and its prey, accompanied by their own mob to bait and goad others to support loudly and proudly in the hope that the chosen target will succumb in some way, and in some cases, actually take their own life as a result of the relentless verbal and psychological battering they receive in public on a daily basis.  Technology’s way of locking someone into stocks in a public space and throwing all manner of things at them, words and physical stance whilst uttering venomous content, in the hope that the perpetrator can be seen to ‘win’ and the crowd cheers like a goal has been scored in a game of soccer.

This podcast will explore this phenomenon and one of the main players (and every so often the bargain basement sidekick that is dragged out as if it is meant to add something of value to the circus) whilst law makers stand idly by and shake their head at yet another replay of cruelty but then go back to reading some legal text book or other, or case notes on someone who is struggling in the legal system somewhere, but a person who is not high profile, so whether that person wins or loses, the said legal professional will not be publicly ‘hung, drawn and quartered’ over their performance in the legal case.

Too many legal entities are happy to be high profile on certain cases, but otherwise they work in the shadows.  I am not denying that working in the shadows is sometimes necessary, but when a public figure decides to be very high profile with illegal activity, and the nation and the global legal community turn a blind eye, then no wonder the said individual/s do it because they know that they are immune.  They certainly do not bother to respond to people like me, but trust me one day they will because the evidence is there, and is building.

I am going to talk about one failing tv personality, whose star is fading and who is desperate to stay in the public eye.  Even when his star was bright, the behaviour was the same, no doubt bolstered by what I was describing earlier – ie perpetrators know that they wont be challenged, so they feel emboldened in their outrageous behaviour, and the added fact that they know about many many skeletons in cupboards of the rich and famous, in many walks of life including legal no doubt, so there is an inbuilt reluctance to interfere or meddle in the problem.  The legal profession just adopts a whistle while your work approach elsewhere, and tell themselves nothing to see here.

The bottom line is there are people out here breaking the law on a regular basis, and nothing is done.  In this case the individual works in the media, and as a result the supposed professional bodies that on paper exist to regulate their respective industries, are a mere token organisation, and are as much use as a chocolate fire guard.

So, lets examine how the legal framework exists, even in its basic form it covers most of the parts it needs to allow it to take action.  Elements have been added over the years, but we still seem to be in a place, where a privileged few are allowed to mistreat others, in full view, and it is deemed acceptable.  The following sections are a summary where the law exists, but it seems to be enforced more on people who do not have the funds to fight back, or their mental health has been so eroded to the point that their only aim is to get through another day, and if it all becomes too much, then they check out on life, as they reach a conclusion that nothing will change.  What an indictment on the legal profession (nationally and internationally) who can cherry pick what they get involved in based upon the financial rewards and professional kudos potentially achieved, and with low risk of losing or upsetting the powers that be. Anyone outside of those categories is doomed. Heaven forbid if the targets are strong willed and also financially strong, then we see this global sport take another sad twist, and it becomes survival of the fittest – both in physical strength and mental fortitude. This is the ‘game’ that is played out in the media across the world, and one example of this here in the UK, but who also has a home in the same USA state as his target.  This is a spin off of the Hunger Games on steroids, and I am tired of asking what the purpose is of all those international law bodies that exist.  None of them wait for an invite to intervene in mistreatment, but yet they hold back on this huge bright star in the sky for all to see, and refuse to see it for what it really is.  Instead they only see a crown with jewels on this star, and as such it is deemed untouchable.  I beg to differ.  Another person who up until now, has hidden behind such a crown, but is suddenly beginning to find out that actions have consequences, and even if the person does not end up incarcerated, the damage to this Institution to which he belongs, or Cult Like Family, whichever description makes you sleep better at night, the damage done is everlasting and history will not be kind.

Let explore aspects of the law that legal advocates want to ignore or underplay the value of its place in this targeting of individuals.

All of my reference sources are listed at the end of the article.

Harassment and the Law

  • It is criminal offence in England and Wales for someone to harass you or to put you in fear of violence. I see no major difference in the state of California.
  • The law states that harassment is when a person behaves in a way which is intended to cause you distress or alarm.
  • The behaviour must happen on more than on one occasion.
  • It can be the same type of behaviour or different types of behaviour on each occasion.
  • Harassment can include things your abuser has said or done.
  • Incidents could have happened recently or they could have happened months apart.
  • Examples of incidents of harassment include:-
    • A text, answer-phone message, letter or email
    • Or comment or threat
    • Standing outside someone’s house or driving past it
    • An act of violence
    • Damage to someone else’s property
    • Maliciously or falsely reporting you to the police when you have done nothing wrong

Putting Someone in Fear of Violence – What Does That Mean?

  • Fear of violence is when someone says or does two or more things that make you fear that violence will be used against you.
  • The law states that a person is guilty of putting you in fear of violence if a reasonable person, who had the same information your abuser had, would think the behaviour would cause you to fear violence.

Restraining Orders:-

  • A restraining order is a court order which prohibits your abuser from doing certain things such as contacting you or attending your place of work or home address. Breaching (breaking) a restraining order is a criminal offence.

Coercive Control and the Law

  • Someone is guilty of coercive control if they repeatedly or continuously engage in behaviour towards you that is coercive or controlling and they know or ought to know that the behaviour will have a serious effect on you.

Harassment Injunctions

  • If you are not associated to your abuser, or if you do not want to apply for a non molestation order, then you can apply for a harassment injunction under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997.
  • You can apply for an injunction against any person who has harassed or stalked you or put you in fear of violence by deliberately causing you distress on two or more occasions.

Social Media Injunction

An example of social media defamation UK the case of DDF v YYZ

“The case of DDF v YYZ established a principle that a victim of social media harassment may serve an injunction on the defendant via the social media platform Instagram.  If you are the victim of harassment cyber bullying or defamation on social media, we will obtain an injunction whilst anonymising you, to protect your reputation and to allow you to continue with uninterrupted use of your social media account.”

  • Serving an injunction via social media platform
    • In the case mentioned above, DDF v YYZ social media lawyer Yar Cohen obtained an injunction against an anonymous Instagram troll and was permitted for the first time in the UK.

Legal Advice on Press Intrusion and Intimidation

Newspapers are not allowed to harass individuals just to get information for a story.  Media intrusion and harassment is a concern for those that are in the limelight and there are various routes that can be pursued where people are feeling harassed

Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO)

  • IPSO enforces (allegedly in my personal opinion) the Editors Code of Practice which sets out the minimum expectations in relation to the conduct of those that are employed by these publications. The Code covers the following issues:
    • Accuracy, privacy, harassment, intrusion into grief or shock, reporting suicide, children, children in sex cases, hospitals, reporting of a crime, clandestine devices and subterfuge – ie the information must not be obtained using hidden cameras or listening devices or intercepting private communicators, victims of sexual assault, discrimination, financial journalism, confidential sources, witness payments in criminal trials, payment to criminals, the public interest

Journalists are not allowed to engage in intimidation, harassment or persistent pursuit and they must:

  • Not continue questioning, telephoning, pursuing or photographing individuals once asked to stop
  • Not remain on property when asked to leave
  • Identify themselves and what publication they are from

 Lots more information on this area of the law in the References listed below, including Verdag.com


Narcissistic Personality Disorder   (NPD)

Narcissistic personality disorder is a personality disorder in which people have an inflated opinion of themselves.  They also have an intense need for the admiration and attention of others.

People with NPD may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they’re not given the praise or special favours they believe they deserve.  Others may see them as snobbish and conceited and may not enjoy being around them.

NPD personality traits:- arrogant, self centred, demanding.

  • They often have high self esteem and may believe they are superior or special compared to other people, however, they seem to need excessive praise and admiration, and they may react poorly to perceived criticism.
  • Tend to exaggerate their own talents and accomplishments, while downplaying those of others. They are usually preoccupied by power, success and beauty.  They might even engage in impulsive behaviours, such as risky sex and gambling.
  • Some traits of NPD may appear similar to confidence, however, healthy confidence and NPD aren’t the same thing.
  • Other traits of NPD is that they tend to put themselves on a pedestal and perceive themselves as better than everyone else.

How Do Narcissists Control You?

  • Self obsessed and control others for their personal gain.
  • Narcissists guarantee success by targeting codependants; they also try to make others feel special using compliments and flattery.
  • They then go on to play with difficult emotions like shock, awe, and guilt to maintain control over their victim.
  • Gaslight/practice master manipulation weakening and destabilizing their victims; finally they utilize positive and negative emotions or moments to trick others
  • When a narcissist cannot control you, they are likely to feel threatened, react with anger, and they might even start threatening you.

Personality Traits that Narcissists Spot and Home in On

“People who are innately good, kind, empathetic, and positive tend to attract narcissists the most. This is because narcissists see a lot of narcissistic supply in them, and that is what draws them.” (the Minds Journal)

Narcissists are also interested in a lot of superficial things like looks, status, money, power, or intellectual prowess. They have a sense of grandiosity and entitlement and want to associate with anyone or anything that will help them to enhance their self-image.

Narcissists consciously or unconsciously look for people who can provide them with their “Narcissistic fix”.

  • People who are caregivers.

A relationship is usually 50/50 and a give and take. But Narcissists inherently know that they are takers and therefore they look for people who are natural caregivers.

  •  People who have empathy

People who have empathy are generally more understanding and forgiving than other people.

Narcissists try to capitalize on this sympathetic behavior by telling them their sob stories about how they had a horrible childhood or past. They do not even mind exaggerating or manipulating these stories to invoke sympathy whenever an Empath tries to confront them for their selfish behavior. They count on such stories and emotional manipulation to get their arrogant behavior excused time and again.

  • People who are successful and well admired in society

Narcissists look for people who are succesful and who have a lot going for them in their lives.  They only mingle with people who will make them look good in the social circle.

  • People who have good hearts and are always looking for the best in others

Narcissists need to target people who believe others are essentially good.


NB:- There are two kinds of narcissists: Somatic and Cerebral

Cerebral Narcissists give a lot of importance to the brain and intelligence and Somatic Narcissists give a lot of importance to looks and their bodily appearance (“Soma” comes from ancient Greek and means “body”.)

All Narcissists use manipulation techniques to exert control over others and get what they want. While Cerebral Narcissists use their brain and intelligence to charm others, Somatic Narcissists use their good looks and external body appearance to impress and manipulate others.


Racial Differences In Narcissistic Tendencies

There is a lot of information in the Reference Sources on this topic, particularly in the material from sciencedirect.com.  Very detailed.  I have questions about the study and its scope and depth, and I personally will be exploring research papers further in the future in terms of the sample group of black participants. What I did read looks very very interesting, and the links are there to enable the reader to look into the research in a more detailed way.  That being said, here is a summary of one of the studies:-

  • Previous research has found that Black individuals report higher levels or self-esteem than White participants.
  • Black participants reported higher levels of narcissism than White participants
  • The association between pathological narcissism and poor psychological adjustment was especially strong for Black individuals.

Overview and Predictions from the Research:-

“Our goal for the present studies was to examine whether racial differences emerged for narcissism in a manner that was similar to the Black self-esteem advantage.  This was accomplished by conducting three studies that compared the narcissism levels of Black and White individuals.  The present research extends the findings of Foster et al. (2003) by using the various measures of narcissism rather than relying solely on the NPL.  Also, the present studies accounted for factors related to narcissism.


The Link Between Psychopathy, Narcissism and Racism

How Racism and Psychopathy Intersect:-

  • Racism has often been described as a condition that stems from ignorance, but researchers have found that people with certain personality disorders are more likely to expouse racist attitudes

The Role of Machiavellianism and Narcissism:-

  • Roy said that his research stands out because, while numerous studies have investigated the toll of racism on minority groups, few have examined the personality traits that make individuals more inclined to hold racist views.
  • A 2017 Austrian study, found that those with the four dark tetrad personality traits – psychopathy, narcissism, sadism, and Machiavellianism – were more likely to vote for a xenophobic presidential candidate with right wing views.

How Research and Treatment Might Help:-

  • Roy hopes his study and others “provide a foundation of empirical research to help inform risk assessment and treatment of those with personality profiles predisposed to devaluing marginalized groups.”


With all those points made above, I would like people to consider all those routes in Law and research carried out by recognised teams, and to ask yourselves why UK media has been allowed to run with harassment and bullying and various forms of abuse, serious ripple effect with mental health issues and no sign of push back from the establishment groups of professional bodies.  One TV presenter/journalist/former Newspaper Editor who has got away with 3 years of abuse of The Sussexes, Meghan for the vast majority.  I quoted some statistics from a Researcher with a Doctorate a few months ago, from the number of articles written in one year by this tv ‘personality’ on Meghan and Harry, and now that he is no longer in his breakfast tv role since last March – arguably an apparent stunt – possibly, if that is the case, because he knew his days were numbered.  His links, which continue, with Meghan’s father, confirm all the points made in this podcast by people with NPD.  When you read the article, you will see I have highlighted certain words in a different colour, not least because they as a collection sum up this individual and it also proves that the laws exist, and grounds for litigation have been more than met, and I end this podcast and article by asking the question, what are law makers going to do about this?  This article will be circulated, and the podcast to  my existing circulation list, with any new organisations I think may have thoughts on it.  Emails will be sent to prominent law makers and people in power.  It is beyond time now, and action is long overdue.  We currently have a private individual and his company doing the work on social media platforms that the owners of those said platforms should be doing.  It is clear that some of those hate accounts, are earning 6 figure sums a year, purely by inciting hate and spreading hate by single purpose account deliberately set up to spread conspiracy theories and hate and lies in a pyramid type of set up.  The work of Bot Sentinel organisation and its CEO Christopher Bouzy is brilliant work and I hope that the international researchers including Prince Harry look further into this extremely valuable work.  Harry has already commented on an earlier report produced by Chris Bouzy.  I hope that this is looked at globally.  The approach can be used globally

It is time for legal intervention.  This presenter has in the past been allowed to have a two page spread with an image of him in a threatening pose.  The article full of threats.  This latest one is a supposed warning of what he is going to do, and his action is going to be against Meghan.  That is yet another threat, and it is about time that the 4 societal groups at the top of the matrix are not allowed to get away with this. The 4 groups protect each other, have each others backs etc.  Neither can survive so well on their own, but with the backing of the other pillars of society, they can feel untouchable. Several areas of the criterion in the law have been met.  Time for a legal intervention to stop these illegal activities from continuing.  Everyone knows that if this was a black person making threats to a white individual it would not be tolerated, and if it was a black person making threats against a white member of the BRF, let alone thousands of articles per year embellishing those threats to a member of the Royal family, it would not be allowed to continue for weeks let alone years. White privilege has and continues to allow this white male to break the law and create danger towards a woman who has not even acknowledge him, and if we look at the number of people who have been targets of his activity, they are mainly strong black women.  The research above outlines why this is the case.  It is time, and I hope that the people who will receive a link to this article and podcast, which will include elected officials in the USA, will sit up and finally take notice.

Ivy Barrow

16 Jan 2022


Reference Sources

UK based Family Law practice.  Vardags.  They have a number of informational Law Guides listed in one section of the Menu on the Home Screen.  Look under Reputation and Privacy Guides / Harassment / Facing Harassment from The Media.   All very interesting indeed.  In fact the whole site is one to bookmark



Envy – The Forgotten Narcissistic Issue


Narcissists Hate Seeing You Happy

https://opsvaw.as.ky.edu               Uk Center for Research on Violence Against Women

  • Top Ten Things Advocates Need to Know
  • Do Protective Orders Work? Who  Violates Orders the Most?

https://sc.edu       South Carolina School of Law   –  A Plaintiff’s Guide to Restraining Orders

https://rightsofwomen.org.uk         Rights of Women – helping women through the law.   Look for the PDF Guide to Harassment and the Law – available on this website.